Romance & Humor for All Ages
Those words do not describe me. I have been making smoothies for myself on and off for months. I have also been making horrible smoothy messes on and off for months. I have this exact, handy-dandy Magic Bullet Blender. It looks fool-proof, but if there’s a way, I’m the fool that will find it. I’m …
When she started chemo, He bought two new 800 thread count Egyptian cotton bed sheet sets. They fit very snugly on their mattress. She no longer has the strength required to get the fitted sheet onto or off of the bed without assistance. He also bought her fancy chocolates. Tonight after dinner, She decided to …
She: “A beautiful morning!” He: “Indeed. Bright light in sky appears in East. Around here, this time of year, that’s news.” She: “This calls for a hearty celebration. Would you care for waffles, or eggs and bacon, or an omelette, or …” He: “Hm. Choices, choices. Let me finish getting dressed first. One cribro at a time.” She: “Cry what?” He: “On …
She: “Hey! I thought you were the mad scientist around here!” He: “Ah, no. Place where I work frowns on the bwa-ha-ha stuff. Bad for fundraising.” She: “So I’ve got to do it?!?” He: “The fundraising? No, we’ve got experts to … oi! Put .. the .. lab .. coat .. down! Do I wish to know where this is coming from?” She: “The island!” He: “The one we live on?” She: “Not this island! That island! The one …
She: “It’s hard keeping all the plot lines straight when you’re writing several stories at once.” He: “Tough to keep all the alibis consistent, is it?” She (ignoring him): “Not to mention all the character names straight. And how they look. Did she have red hair in this other story too?” He: “Easy fix. Keep …
She: “Please pass the salad dressing?” He: “OK … Dang!” She: “What dang?” He: “Something else we can’t use because we have town water.” She: “I like town water. Or do you really wish to go back to flushing the toilet with a bucket?” He: “Not I. But it means we can’t use the salad dressing. Read.” She: “‘Shake well.’” He: “Exactly! We don’t have a well. And if you think I’m going …
She: “Did you know that handkerchiefs are coming back into vogue?” He: “No …” She: “And … never mind, I can’t tell you.” He: “Can’t tell me what?” She: “About the cool colors they come in now. You’d be appalled.” He: “Probably. But I’m going to find out sooner or later, so …” She: “Purple, …
Currently, beta readers are checking my first book for continuity errors and plot holes. Apparently they want better writing and are picky about their coffee, too.
After Jack’s family moved from Australia to America, Jack came home within an hour of being left in his first grade classroom. “These yanks are mental,” he said. “I ain’t no sheila and I’m not going back!” “Whatever happened?” His mum asked. “Teacher says I gotta skip to the loo!” ~*~ In memory of G-Man’s 55 …